my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Sorry about my life...
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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