My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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