I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
