we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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