I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
