just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
