just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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