Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Randomize
