so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
