FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
