big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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