I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Randomize
