I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
