she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize