i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
