When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
FUCK WHALES
A bitchslap is in order.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
