Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
they're like a gay fantastic four
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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