I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
