He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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