How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
