so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
