it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
