she was so not down for the gang bang
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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