Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
