And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
