bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
