so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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