false alarm. still invincible.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize