I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
How naked do you want me to be?
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