she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize