i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
