I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
