Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
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