the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
