im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
