i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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