I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
My liver just had a heart attack.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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