Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
