Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
