Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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