Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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