you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Randomize
