Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
