Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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