yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I stole a fireplace last night.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
They are going to name an STD after you.
Randomize
