Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
