We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I think a kid would responsible me up
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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