I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
She bit a glass in half.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
