Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
