Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
