I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I could have mohawked her pubes.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
